To Love and to Cherish Read online

  “A widow shouldn’t look attractive,” Norman insisted. “You might as well announce that you’d welcome male attention.”

  “You can rest easy on that score. I will never marry again.” She was pleased to see her answer had surprised Norman.

  “Certainly you wouldn’t marry again for several years. Noah deserves a suitable period of mourning, which your choice of attire fails to honor. You should wear only black for the next several months.”

  “We’re not likely to agree on what’s suitable for me to wear, but if it will make you feel any better, I’ll be happy to consult Sibyl or Naomi when I go shopping again.”

  “I hope you don’t intend to model your behavior on Naomi.”

  “I don’t intend to model my behavior on anybody. I have enough intelligence to make my own decisions.” She needed to get to the reading of the will. She was becoming so annoyed it was hard to keep it out of her voice or her expression. “Why don’t you tell me what’s in Noah’s will? The sooner you hand over control of his estate to me, the sooner you can get back to work.”

  Norman assumed the pompous attitude that always made Laurie long to slap him. “It’s not quite that simple.”

  “Why not? I’m his only heir.”

  “Noah left the house and its contents to you.”

  “I know that. What I need to know is how much money I have.”

  “You don’t have any money. He left the rest of his estate to me to administer for your benefit.”

  For a moment, Laurie was afraid her heart would never beat again. She struggled to draw breath, but her body was paralyzed. She couldn’t move or speak. She felt weak, so dizzy she was afraid she would faint. Norman’s mouth opened. He must have been saying something, but it sounded like bees buzzing in her ears.

  Then everything went blank.

  Two

  The first thing Laurie was aware of was a wet cloth on her forehead. She could make out the murmur of voices, but she couldn’t understand what they were saying. She was lying down, but the bed was so hard she couldn’t possibly sleep. Where was she? Noah would never have bought such a bed.

  “She’s coming around,” she heard Cassie say to someone else in the room. “Watch what you say. If you make her faint again, there’ll be hell to pay.”

  “I didn’t make her faint. She did it on her own. And I won’t have an employee of mine, especially a woman, using such language in my bank.”

  That was Norman’s voice, but what was he doing here? And why did he think she was in his bank?

  “Help me lift her into that chair. I’m not strong enough to do it alone.”

  “Why can’t she remain where she is until she can lift herself?”

  “Because it’s not dignified for a lady, especially your sister-in-law, to be lying on the floor.”

  “She should have thought of that before she fainted.”

  “What did you say to her? It must have been awful.”

  “It certainly was not. I was merely discussing the provisions of my brother’s will.”

  Laurie opened her eyes to see Cassie looking down at her, her beautiful young face a mask of concern.

  “From her reaction, I’d guess he left everything to you.”

  “The contents of the will are no concern of yours.”

  “I expect everybody in town will know before nightfall.” Cassie helped Laurie sit up. “How are you feeling?”

  “A little dizzy. What happened? Why am I on the floor?”

  “Mr. Spencer said something to make you faint.”

  “I did no such thing,” Norman protested.

  “Help me up. I can’t stay sitting on the floor.”

  Norman tried to help her up, but he was so tentative he was more of a hindrance. Once in the chair, Laurie smoothed her hair and straightened her skirt. “Thank you, Cassie. I’d have been in a sad way without your help. Now Norman has to tell me why I fainted.”

  “Are you sure you’re strong enough?”

  “Yes.” What choice did she have?

  “I think you ought to see the doctor when you leave. A healthy young woman like you ought not to faint.”

  “I’ll be all right. I’m sure it was the stress of Noah’s death and the funeral.”

  “If you faint again, I’m calling the doctor myself.”

  After the door closed behind Cassie, Laurie turned to Norman. Her strength was returning. Along with it came seething anger. “Now I remember. Why would Noah leave everything to you? Did you force him to do it?”

  Norman was incensed. “I have never forced my brother to do anything. It is a perfectly ordinary thing to do. No woman is capable of handling an estate on her own.”

  “I’ve worked in the store, so I know how it’s run. I don’t see any reason why I can’t have my money.”

  “You do have your money. It’s just that I’ve been left to manage it for you.”

  “How do you intend to manage it?”

  “As I said, he left you the house and its contents.”

  “Can I sell it?”

  “No. Why would you want to?”

  “Then I don’t have a house any more than I have any money.” Noah was controlling her from the grave.

  “You have a house and you have money. I’ll make you a suitable allowance each month.”

  “How much?”

  “I’ll decide that once I’ve had a chance to go over Noah’s household accounts.”

  “I can tell you how much I need.”

  Norman took on the appearance of a prune. “Noah’s will directed me to make all decisions about your money.”

  “I would like a hundred dollars immediately. I need to buy new clothes and some new furnishings for the house.” She might as well have told Norman she wanted to throw everything in her house into the street. He puffed up like a hot pastry.

  “What’s wrong with the house?”

  “Nothing. I just want to replace some furnishings I don’t care for.”

  “Noah chose everything in that house.”

  “That’s why I want to buy some new ones. He chose them, not me.”

  “Do you intend to purchase more clothes like the ones you have on?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with my clothes. I already said I’d talk to Naomi or Sibyl before I buy anything more.”

  “I believe it would be better if I went along to approve your purchases.”

  “You don’t trust my cousins? Not even your own wife?”

  “There are a lot of single men who come through our town. They are not the kind of men who are likely to think well of a woman dressed as you are.”

  Laurie didn’t need Norman to say anything further for her to know he intended to use her money to control her as tightly as her husband had done. She had been given freedom just long enough to taste it before it was snatched away. She had to do something to keep this from happening, but she didn’t know what it would be. In the meantime, she was so angry she’d say something to make the situation worse if she didn’t leave. “How much money will you give me? I will need to buy food.”

  He reached inside a drawer in his desk and withdrew a handful of silver coins. “Here’s twenty dollars. Since you will have your own money, you won’t need to buy anything from the store on credit.”

  He really did intend to supervise everything she bought. She accepted the coins with a shaking hand. She put them inside her purse and rose. “I’ll let you know when I need more money.”

  “We haven’t discussed—”

  “I don’t see any need to discuss anything further when you’ve made it clear you plan to make my decisions for me. Should I let you know when I’m close to starvation, or can I expect twenty dollars next week?”

  “I don’t think you need that much money a week just for food.”

  If she stayed any longer, she’d throw something at him. “I’m surprised you didn’t decide to keep the money and send me what food you think I need.”

  She left his office while he wa
s speaking, but she didn’t need to hear what he was saying to know she’d exchanged one prison for another. She couldn’t be sure this one wouldn’t be worse. At this moment, she was sure of only one thing—she didn’t know what she would do or how she would do it, but she would not live one day longer than necessary under Norman’s thumb. On her way out, she walked by Cassie with no more than a curt good-bye, but courtesy would have to wait. Right now she needed to get as far away from Norman and his bank as she could.

  She looked about, but there was really no place to go. If anyone saw her wandering about the countryside, they’d be sure she was distraught over Noah’s death and refuse to leave her alone until they’d peppered her with enough questions to satisfy themselves she wasn’t going to hurt herself. If they only knew! Nothing could hurt her more than the marriage she’d endured. She would go home. She needed to think.

  Laurie didn’t know how long she’d sat staring into space before she heard a knock at the door, and Naomi let herself in.

  “Cassie said Norman said something to cause you to faint this morning. Are you all right? I thought you went to talk about the will.”

  It took Laurie only a few minutes to explain the situation. It wouldn’t have taken as long if Naomi hadn’t interrupted so many times to express her indignation and anger.

  “How can Norman do that?”

  “Norman didn’t. Noah did, and I’m certain it can’t be changed.”

  “I’ll talk to—” She stopped.

  Laurie knew Naomi had started to say she would talk to Vernon Edwards. He was a lawyer, but he was also Norman’s father-in-law. They could expect no help there. In all probability, he’d written the will for Noah.

  “There has to be something you can do,” Naomi insisted. “If nothing else, we can try to bring enough pressure on Norman to embarrass him.”

  “It won’t do any good. Norman will claim he was only doing what Noah wanted, which we all know is the truth. You can’t go against a dying man’s wishes.”

  “A dead man, and what he wishes is cruel. You have a lot of people on your side. We’ll figure out something.”

  But Laurie didn’t need everybody else to figure out something. She wanted to do it herself. She’d been given her life back. She didn’t plan to let it slip out of her control again.

  “What would you like to do?” Naomi asked. “Run the store?”

  That’s what Laurie had assumed she wanted to do, but as soon as the words were out of Naomi’s mouth, she knew she wanted nothing to do with that store. It was as much part of Noah’s prison as the house she would be forced to live in. “As far as I’m concerned, my father can take it over.”

  “Do you think Norman will let him? Everybody knows your father is a lousy businessman. We also know he forced you to marry Noah so Noah wouldn’t kick him out.”

  Could her humiliation be more complete? “I don’t care what happens to the store. If Norman had any sense, he’d turn it over to Mae Oliver and Elsa Drummond. Nobody knows more about what everybody in this town likes, and their husbands would help them. If they put Ted Drummond behind the counter, every woman within a hundred miles would come in just to look at him.”

  Naomi laughed. “If he and Cassie got married, their children would be so beautiful they’d blind you.”

  Laurie grinned, but only briefly.

  “If you could do anything you wanted, what would you really like to do?” Naomi asked again.

  “I’d like to own a ranch.” The answer surprised even Laurie. She didn’t know anything about running a ranch. Why would she want to own one?

  “Are you sure you don’t mean a farm?”

  “If you mean like people had in Kentucky, no.” She was sure it was a ranch.

  “You don’t have any money, and I know Norman would never give you money to invest in a ranch. Besides, the only rancher I know is Jared Smith, and he may not be here much longer. I heard Norman turned down his request for a loan to buy Herefords.”

  An idea struck Laurie that was beautiful in its simplicity. She had a lot of money no one knew she had. It was a guilty secret, but she’d kept it against the day when she had no choice but to use it. That day had come. She would lend Jared Smith the money he needed, and she would become his partner.

  ***

  “Where are you going to find the money?” Jared’s nephew, Steve, asked. “If you don’t have it when the Herefords get here, the owner is just going to keep going.”

  “I know that,” Jared said. “I was sure that snotty-nosed banker would be happy to lend me the money, but somebody’s convinced him the only cows that will survive in the Arizona Territory are longhorns.”

  “I think you ought to give up on Herefords and keep the longhorns we have. We don’t know how those fancy cows will do out here.”

  Out here had a lot in common with where he’d grown up in Texas. It was hot, dry, and it would take thirty-five acres to support a single cow, but he had the advantage of a ready market in the troops at Fort Verde. He had seen his first Herefords in Virginia during the war. Their traits of economy in feeding, natural aptitude to grow and gain weight from grass, rustling ability, hardiness, early maturity, and prolificacy were exactly what he needed if his ranch was to be a success. But Herefords were scarce. It was pure luck that a man was crazy enough to attempt to trail a herd through Arizona to California. If he didn’t buy this herd, he might never get the chance again.

  “They’ll do just fine.”

  “Are you sure he will sell to you?”

  “No, but it’s a long way to California. Money in hand is better than money he can only imagine. If I can offer him an acceptable price, I believe he’ll sell me the herd.” But that was the problem. He was certain the man would only sell the whole herd. What would be the point of selling part of a herd if he still had to make the dangerous journey with those left unsold, especially when he’d get twice as much for them if he could make it to California?

  Jared had known leaving the army to invest in a ranch was a gamble. He had grown up in Texas and knew all about longhorns, but the previous owner had made only a small profit with only longhorns. Jared knew he needed good stock he could make still better through selective breeding.

  “We don’t have the money, so you might as well stop thinking about it,” Steve told him. “Now we’ve got work to do. You coming?”

  “I have some things I need to do in the office. I’ll join you after lunch.”

  Steve made a rude sound. “If you can consider anything Odell cooks food. I don’t know how you can eat it.”

  “It’s better than what I ate during the war.”

  “I didn’t fight in the war, so I’m not used to eating stuff that would cause dogs to turn up their noses.”

  “If you can find a better cook, I’ll hire him. Until then, you’ll have to eat what Odell cooks or cook it yourself.”

  “Then I would starve. I know why you came to Arizona, but I don’t see why we have to stay here now that you haven’t found any trace of your brothers. It’s worse than Texas.”

  Steve’s departure left Jared with too many questions and too few answers. If he couldn’t buy the kind of cows he wanted, could he afford to continue to ranch? Was it fair to keep Steve in a place he disliked and a thousand miles away from his mother’s family? Maybe most important of all, was he wasting time in his search for his brothers? Why was he so determined to find two men he could barely remember and who might not remember him or want to be found?

  His adopted parents had told him Logan had been four and Kevin one when their birth parents died. That was twenty-nine years ago. More than enough time to have built a life that had nothing to do with him, that probably had no place for him in it. What did he really expect to do if he found them? They would be strangers. Beyond birth parents he barely remembered, he would have no more in common with them than a man he met on the street.

  Yet he couldn’t stop looking. His adoptive parents had been loving and kind, but he’d alway
s felt incomplete, like a part of him had been lost when his parents died and their boys had been adopted by three different families. Maybe he just wanted to know his brothers were alive. At thirty-two, he’d already lost two sets of parents, a brother, and a sister-in-law. All he had left of his family was Steve. Maybe he was reaching out because if something happened to Steve, he would be alone. There was no single reason. It was simply something he had to do.

  But right now he had a desk covered in work that needed to be tackled.

  Jared didn’t know when he became aware of the sound of a buggy approaching the house. That in itself was unusual. The trails through the valley were so rough that many could only be navigated on horseback. That meant the buggy must have come from Cactus Corner. That name immediately conjured up an image of the young widow, Laurie Spencer. He’d tried without success to put her out of his mind. He’d had two dreams that were so real he’d come awake in a state of arousal that was as uncomfortable as it was impossible to gratify.

  It was foolish to taunt himself with thoughts of her. He had nothing to offer such a woman. She was related to half the people in Cactus Corner and was a wealthy and beautiful widow. He wouldn’t be surprised if she left Arizona altogether. Endowed with looks and money, she would be a success just about anywhere. He should put her out of his mind. He needed to finish this last letter so he would be ready to greet his visitor. He was the only one in the house.

  When he stepped out on the porch, he was convinced the sun had to be in his eyes or that he was seeing who he wanted to see. But it took only a minute before he realized he wasn’t mistaken. Laurie Spencer was driving the buggy that even now was slowing down as it approached his house. His mind went blank. What could she possibly want with him, and why was it so important that she would have driven all the way from town by herself?

  Rousing himself from his stupor, he hurried down the steps. When the buggy came to a halt, he tethered the horse to the hitching post and moved to help Laurie alight.

  “Welcome to Green River Ranch.” He held out his hand to help her down. “You shouldn’t have come alone. There’s still danger from Indians.”